The Iron Lady vs the Iron Duke (oh the irony)

Mainly quiet on the Western Front recently and I have had time to engage in joint manoevres with other regiments around the square. This proved fascinating as we had a secret rendez-vous with a top international crime -fighter who brought us tales of major book thieves (and none of them - despite what Markus Zusak would have you believe) called Liesel. Having been informed that plates that had been surreptitiously removed from rare books are probably financing international drug deals by now, most of us were somewhat shaken out of our cozy complacency and vowed to set up an undercover 'sting' involving Gin (supplied my my good friend General Gordon Gin-soaked of the eponymous Highland Regiment), Marzipan and a few AK47s (supplier confidential).

I returned to the barracks feeling suitable steeled-up, only to face a delegation from the Household Cavalry led by a female general (no doubt related to the recently deceased Iron Lady) with a voice like a screech-owl who proved to be on her metal  - much to my dismay. Said general insisted that the book trolley was unsightly and clashed with the luridly floral sofas near the fireplace and therefore had to be removed immediately. I informed her (borrowing some Iron from Sartre's Soul) that if she wanted to provide me with a bookcase with shelves tall enough to display several folio-sized tomes, I would be happy to removed said 'unsightly' trolley. This battle, I feel, will raise temperatures higher than the average blast furnace (though - partly thanks to aforementioned Iron Lady, you won't find too many of those around these parts). But beware Iron Ladies: I have the Iron Duke himself on my side. Let battle commence.